Pain is a common term for all the suffering we endure. Let's focus on emotional pain more rather than physical pain. Difficulties, challenges, disappointment, grief, anger, fear, hardships, etc., can be felt as pain. Pain is just a pain, yet some pain's are more painful. Sometimes they hurt so much that you cannot breathe, it aches in your blood, bones and every cell in your body. You couldn't even trace it to a location. Because it hurts everywhere. You hardly manage to pull yourself out of it, but one snap was all that required to go through the same pain all over again. Mostly the pain resides in memories, you cannot forget what happened and you cannot accept why certain things happened the way they did.
Is there any way out? Let's explore
First of all, it is not easy to come out of the pain. Even though the pain you experience may seen trivial from other person's perspective, it is so real for you. Is it real for the individual person. They cannot just see a way out of the rabbit hole. Everyone, irrespective of the age group experience pain, it is just different levels. For a high school students, clearing a test may be painful, for college students its clearing a semester. Once you do that, getting a job. After job, it is growth, finding a soul mate, then kids would come into the world, taking care of them, making them socially independent and you go through the same cycle again. So everybody is experiencing some kind of pain every now and then. No exception. But even this doesn't make us feel better, because for us the pain we experience is so real.
So what can be done?
One thing about Pain is that it matters, what ever or whoever hurts you, it or they matter. It hurts because it matters. Find a way out of the pain. Whatever or whoever hurts you, forgive them. Nobody is right or wrong, it is all perspective. Even though this is hard to accept initially, this is the truth. Most common suffering with pain is that, people keep reliving the situation again and again mentally, they cannot just see a way out. They keep playing the scenarios, how it turned out, how it should have happened, how it could have been, how peaceful they would be it it didn't happen. Should have's and could have's will kill you. The suffering made you stronger, kinder, understandable. Be the one who understands. Be the one who cares. Be the one who forgives. Forgive others and yourself. Don't keep on holding the pain, it destroys us. Let go. Come out of the pain even stronger, don't let the pain make you a bitter person, be the better person. Accept the moment completely without resistance. Be the one who judges people less and understands them more. Make something beautiful out of the pain, start a new hobby or start working towards your passion. There is so much pain and energy, divert it in a positive way. Something useful and wonderful will emerge from the pain.
Why pain?
Even though it might sound silly, believe that everything happens for a reason. It might not make sense now or in the near future, but at one moment in time it would make sense. Life will be more meaningful in the retrospect. Pain makes us stronger, it makes us wise, it gives us an opportunity for growth, more over it teaches us who we are. When something bad (perspective) happens, and you are shattered in million pieces, you know where you are, but deep down you are lost, you don't have any plans for the future or cannot even sleep or smile. Use this moment to explore yourself deeply and know yourself. Come out stronger. Make something positive out of this. Turn the pain into an opportunity or even a blessing. The pain or the suffering you endured was necessary for your growth, or else you would be stagnant. Otherwise, you wouldn't have changed at all. Try to see everything from a positive perspective, make it into something positive.
Lost your job? Of course, it is bad. But, use this time to do things you always wanted to do. Learn a musical instrument, read that book, go on an adventure in the meanwhile. When you get your job back, you will realize how precious those moments were. Got sick? Stay home at get some rest. Give your mind some rest, when you get well and come back, you might even come back as a whole new person. I have been enduring pain a lot and lately I started seeing it as pointer or even blessing. It hurts because it needs attention, it matters. The pain points exactly which part of your life needs re-alignment. Either you need to accept the moment completely, sometimes you cannot do anything about it. Other times things need to change or some other times, the change was needed in you. Other times, Let go. Breathe. Surrender. Don't hang on the pain so much that it hurts you deeply. Pull yourself out of the rabbit hole. After all, whether there is light at the end of the tunnel or not, you got be your own light. Sometimes, you got walk through the darkness to find the light inside you. Know that there was light inside you all along. Be the light that pulls you out of darkness.
Final words,
Don't keep re-living the painful situation over and over again. Make a choice. Allow time to heal yourself. Come out stronger as ever. Kind is strong. Make anything beautiful out of the pain. Use it in a positive way. Turn it into a blessing. After all, the situation that you are going through was absolutely necessary for your soul growth. Look for the things that you could turn into blessings.
