A day by the ocean shore

 By the time I had reached the ocean, the sun was playing hide and seek with the clouds. Cumulus completely covered the sky and blue tinge was nowhere to be found. I could hear the sound of the waves crashing across the shore loud and clear. Gushing waves hitting hard every time, pulling back, again hitting hard, as if something is trying to escape the vast blue deep ocean. The ocean breeze was cold. Footsteps were sloppy due to the sandy shores, I could hardly follow a straight line. Often, at most of the time, perhaps, when I reached the shore, I felt heavy. As if something was hung from my shoulder to knees, the weight was pulling me, and it was hard to walk. Maybe, while for others the ocean was entertainment, refreshing or a happy place. For me, it was a therapy. I was much needed to keep my sanity in check from time to time. There was this darkness deep inside me that was lurking in, it came out and crumbled my life into pieces from time to time and went back to its place quietly. If it wasn’t so terrible, then it would be extremely funny. I came to the edge of the cliff and held my arms wide open. I didn’t want someone to hug me, it was completely different. I was suffocating, all through my life, every now and then, I just wanted to breathe. Everything was grey and black, lively colors were gone. Everything was dark. Night started to creep in. I stood there sitting by myself. I felt peaceful, as I kept staring at the waves. I lost track of time and the world around me started to fade away. I didn’t know what I was doing. I just wanted to be alone for a while so that my pain would wash away by the waves. 

💭